Wait A Minute!

Why is life so full of waiting? Waiting on the next paycheck. Waiting on the next semester, or the next day. That it might be better or put us further a head so we can then wait for our career to take off, for our classes to get more interesting, to complete our all important plans. We wait on a girlfriend or boyfriend. We wait to get engaged to the special someone then we wait to get married, next is the honeymoon! We wait for our kids to be born, more importantly the pregnancy to end. Then for then next eighteen years we wait for them to move out. The four years after that we wait to stop having to pay for everything they do and the mistakes that they make. Then we wait to retire. We wait to see our grandchildren, and then we end up waiting on the dentist to give us our dentures, and in the bathroom line for the tenth time in that day.
We spend so much time waiting, dreaming of the next best thing. What we don’t realize is often times we don’t get a chance to see the things we are waiting for or are disappointed by what they look like when we get an extended look at them. Why is it that we either rush past or sit idle while something wonderful is right in front of us?
We always hear people say that we may not have tomorrow. While this is true it may be more accurate to say we may not have the next hour, minute and so on. Life is fragile and we need to start capturing the moments that are WAITING FOR US TO DISCOVER THEM. Just a thought I had.

Fullness Found In You

There is a satisfaction that pours over you when you begin to realize the insane amount of love that God has for us. The truth that the designer, creator, and sustainer of the universe is simultaneously controlling the cosmos as well as controlling something as trivial as a bruise in my knee, blows my mind. Something majestic enough to breath out all known existing things, desires intimacy with me? The One who always was, always is, and is to come knew me before I was born?
Staggering, flooring, breathtaking, exhilarating, humbling, paralyzing, stimulating... I wish I could describe how I have felt in response to His Extravagant Love. He designed every fiber of my existence and He holds me together. He holds the keys to death. He is the key to understanding life. Though, His ways are beyond all understanding. His thoughts are not our thoughts, His ways are not our ways. His knowledge surpasses... everything. He has shown His love for us in the intricacies of creation. Our bodies are living examples of His power and purpose.

God in His love, His nature, has brought me so close to himself and held me there intensely. From His arms I have seen miracles daily. I have seen Him paint masterpieces and begin new ones. I've been corrected by Him and consoled, convicted and compelled. The intensity of His love for me has brought me to my knees.

On my knees I remain, humbled by the Love of God, the Grandeur of the Almighty, the Intimacy of the Father. I pray before the throne, that God would continue to hold me, to hold my life. Lord make yourself known in every moment. Let me see Your face, Your artistry. I thank You for the incredible work you've done in my life since my last post. I praise you for the mistakes that you've carried me through, the pits you've pulled me out of, the success that you've worked out, and the people you have intricately placed into my life who have delivered your truth.

I Love You God.

Be Real

Lately I have been trying to wrap my head around the games that people play in social situations. The "game" if you will. It seems to me that each person has a number of scripts that they have to choose from in every circumstance. All of us are so in danger of getting wrapped up with choosing the appropriate script according to how we are going to make everyone feel around us. Now this may sound harsh, but I'm starting to not care what people think. Does that sound bad? We often hear those words in the form of a proclamation that we are standing up for what we are doing because we know it's right, contrary to whatever inverse pressure we feel. This situation is not what I'm getting at here. I'm really not interested in how people perceive each action that I take. Truly, I'm only concerned with one opinion, that of my savior Jesus.

We waste so much energy in coming up with the best action we can take, trying to keep everyone happy. There are countless hours spent worrying whether or not something will be taken the right way(When more often than not, most people will just lie and adjust what our "intention" was according to how someone reacts). All this problem solving energy could be spent figuring out how to serve someone best.

BTW there is a big difference between serving someone and trying to avoid stepping on thier toes. You serve someone by loving them and being patient, but you are crippling someone when you are too afraid to be real around them. If everyone where real, there would be far less social issues because people would no longer have to play the guessing game. (see more games) STOP ACTING!!! STOP TIP TOEING!!!

Sometimes people need there toes stepped on so they look down and see where they are going.

Summer Valley

I guess you could call me a mountian lover. I can't tell you how awesome it was to wake up one morning in Denver and look out the window and wittness the sunrise climbing up the rockies. In Boone N.C., being able to stand outside the hotel and in every direction seeing rolling masses of land shooting into the sky is something I will never forget. It's such a beautiful thing to me to drive along an interstate and rather than seeing a city skyline, I get to see amazing fingerprints of God. There is nothing like looking down from my window seat as I took off out over alabama's smaller mountians. The clouds were so close to the ground that the tops of the mountians were the only thing that you could see jutting up through what looked like cotton spread out in the valley's.

I've noticed something about mountains, not very many people live on them. I'm pretty sure that the top of Mt. Everest laid a city. It would tick me off if i payed a lot of money and worked harder than ever to get to tho top on;y to find a nice little cottage and a small airport. What's the point of climbing to the top of the mountain if people live there already. 

See, live happens in the valley's. In flying over Birmingham all the tips of the mountains where covers in trees, not houses. When I was snowboarding in Colorado, it was miles it seemed down a slope before the first building. if you where to travel to any place on the globe you would find that cities usually come together in valleys. 

I feel that the same if true of our walk with Jesus. A lot of people want to get to the mountain top experience and not go home. I would love to make my home there and never leave. But Life happens in the valley. The valley is where we get our bread. The Valley is where we go to school to learn, it is where we do our work. The valley is even where we rest. Sure it's relaxing to get to the summit, sit and rest a while. Some say though that it's actually harder to climb down hill. 

(GOD IS AWESOME FOR GIVING US SUCH OBVIOUS METAPHORS)

Everything??? -Conclusion

First, thank you all for your response. It was a blessing to hear such varied responses. I felt like I knew what direction my conclusion was headed after I posted the last blog. The responses solidified my view!



I must state that the best thing for us is GOD himself! So what we should want is the fullness of him manifested in our lives.



In my previous blog I was talking more about the desires we have for this life. The desire may be for things we can attain, things we want to accomplish, places we want to go, or people we want in our lives. I mention some suppositions in my last blog as well, supposing these desires will not harm other people and even that they might further the Kingdom. Should we be able to have them or should we live with some not being fulfilled?



I have resolved that we should not be able to receive all of the desires in this life.

First, our desires will not always be for the benefit of all and/or they may not always further the Kingdom. But even for those desires that qualify, I don't feel that God allows us to attain each one. Sure he gives us desires and allows us to attain certain things, but to have everything would or could be harmful. It may cause us to put ourselves above God, knowing we had a role in gaining this contentment. (I'll get back to contentment) Also it would leave us null, with out drive or motivation to inspire us to work towards the things God has put before us.



Here is where the contentment comes in. There is nothing that we could ever gain in this world that should leave us fully content. If that was the case then there would be no need for heaven or for Christ to return.



BUT!!!
All of the above has been approached with the narrow view that this is one life and the next life (after our death in this world) will be a separate life. There is no break between this life and eternal life. Eternity starts for us the moment we give our lives to Christ! We have been promised eternal life through Christ Jesus, and if our true desire is to see his Kingdom come and to reign, then our desire will be met, this is marvelous!!!

We only have one life to live, true, but because of the blood it will never end! Praise God in Heaven and on earth. While he always allows us to maintain a drive and motivation to seek and do his will, he may not let us see the finish line of that desire. However GOD in his goodness will satisfy us on the day of our deliverance to him! Thank you Jesus!

I think of Moses, I'm sure his desire was to enter into the Promise Land, the desire was never met. Still though, Moses in his growing developed his desires and demanded that God show him his Glory. I've thought for so long that God would not give me a desire without the means or opportunity to fulfill that desire. Only now as I type these words have I discovered that God may only use these things to inspire me, and motivate me to chase after him.

Hmmm...
JIA!!!
(Jesus is Awesome)

Everything?????

I need some help on this...

Should we be able to have everything we want?
I mean sure your first instinct is to say no of course not. But should we not be able to have everything we want even if the things we want are good things that will not be a bane to society? Even for all the people who work hard everyday and never give up, should they get the things that they want? Assuming that they cant afford it, should it be given to them? How about the people that can afford it, should they be able to buy or create everything they want? Remember now, these are good things and they will not harm other people.

In the best of conditions would it be helpful or harmful for a person or group of people to get everything, or even most everything that they want? Even if they are things that bring people comfort. Whats would be the effect?

Let me know what you think, this is something that has really been on my mind today!

What if....

-What if we really believed prayers are answered?

-What if our hearts yearned for the time in which Jesus would return, rather than giving the plans we have for our lives today priority?

-What if God was as real to us as the ground we stand on and the food we eat, recognizing that he is just essential for our survival?

-What if we realized that God is completely Sovereign, being wrapped up in every detail of our existence?

-What if we believed that God is completely Providential, giving us everything we need at just the right moment?

-What if we truly trusted the Character of God that has been laid out so clearly in His word, and furthermore materialized in our lives?

-What if we truly loved our neighbor, caring more for their soul than for our own comfort?

-What if we knew, with all certainty, that the same God who supplied food and water for the Israelites everyday for nearly 10,000 days, is the same God who is going to continue to meet our needs daily?

-What if, as the body of Christ, we didn't have to tell people that Christ is alive in us, do to the overwhelming evidence that the Kingdom if Heaven is near through seeing our fruit?

-What if we believed that with Christ living through us the Kingdom of God is upon us? Just as the tabernacle carried the Ark of the Covenant wherever God lead the Israelites, we carry the Holy Spirit wherever God leads us and therefore, we take the Kingdom wherever we go.

---Finally--- What if, because of everything above, each of us knew that we don't have to wait to die in order to know the full peace of God? Christ told us to pray that that the kingdom come on earth as it is in heaven. So while the earth will not have perfect peace as it is in heaven, I still know that heaven is on earth in us. God sent the Kingdom to earth 2000 years ago, and I believe he allowed it to return to us through the Holy Spirit. So that we may have no more weeping, no more hurt or pain, no more suffering, for he holds us now. Or as Colossians says, "hold us together."

p.s. -What if all of this became more than a blog? What would it look like if all followers of Jesus began to live out their lives knowing that this life is part of the Kingdom as well. This fake paper and imaginary ink needs to stain our hearts and become a declaration song.

Luke 21:31 "Even so, when you see these things happening, you know that the kingdom of God is near."

Otis

Once, and older man was in the middle of his daily routine. A very thoughtful, analytical type of guy. He wasn't a man that needed a routine but he worked very efficiently within one. It gave him more time to think and to contemplate the big questions that always seemed to be on his mind. On this day, when he reached the post office he entered just as he normally did. He went to his P.O. box then took care of his business with the familiar faces at the counter afterward. Walking out to his car his perspective would be changed. His routine would be added to in a way that he never could have imagined.

A strange man approached him. Strange in the way that he addressed him as friend without so much as even an introduction, or name. The man was strange in the way he smelled, looked, walked and spoke. His charcoal skin was rough and dirty, he eyes yellow and red, sore from the sun. Nothing could be noticed about the mas clothes because the attention his eyes demanded made it hard for the older man to care what he was wearing. As the strange man approached he asked the older man for some change. At this point he had gained the older man's attention because he had just emptied his glove box out the day before for someone else.

Pausing the older man explained why he didn't have change. The strange man became annoyed having heard the story before and started to walk away. The older man stopped him saying "wait now, I would love to help you but I just don't have any cash." The strange man looked back and asked, "well how about a meal from the store up here?" Looking the older man got in his truck, pointed in agreement  and pulled to the front of the store. After going inside and purchasing a "combo" the older man began to walk away having done his deed. The strange man shouted accolades to the older man, almost jumping out of his skin at the thought of the meal he was about to eat. The Older man now sitting in his truck rolled down the passenger window and asked for the strange mans name. "Otis," he replied. "Well Otis, you enjoy that meal and I will be praying for you," the man said as he pulled off. 

Days went by, each time the man got to that same point in his day, he thought of Otis, and he prayed. In coming and leaving from that area the man would consider what he would do if Otis were to approach him again. Would he buy another meal or would he pass by? 

A week went by and the moment came when Otis, a bit more familiar spotted the older man. Before he could ask him anything the older man said, "You hungry?" Otis in disbelief answered "Yes , sir." 

"Well lets get you something to eat." said the older man as he pulled his truck to the same place. He walked inside as Otis became just as excited as before. "Combo!" Otis yelled. The older man asker Otis, "so how have things been this past week?" 

"Oh, see the work force hasn't been sending anybody out in a few days." answered Otis. 

"Well, I'll keep praying," repeated the man.  

More time went by and the old man began to think if he should continue to help Otis. He was not a well set man by any means, but at the same time he wasn't poor either. Paycheck to paycheck, owing the bank money and still trying to make ends meet. Would the prayers really pull through? Would he have enough? 

Then came the day, again in the post office, this time delayed, stood the older man deep in thought again. Will he be out there? What should I ask him? How has he been? Then he began to pray for Otis. As he walked out, Otis walked out of a building near by. The older man waved and Otis asked, "hey buddy, could you help me out one more time?" "Sure, exclaimed the man!" This time the man walked with Otis down the street to the store. "What would the man say to him?" thought the older man. 

Before anything came out of his mouth Otis asked "why is it that you are so kind to me?"

Stopped in his tracks by the rush of realizing a prayer had been answered he said, "Christ has gotten a hold of my life and I want to show love to you." Words began to flow out of his mouth, "He created me just like he created you. I'm not rich by any means but I'm doing alright. So you are having a rough time, I'm here to help. Christ said to do this for the least of these. I'm praying for you and I know that this is what God is calling us to do." In shock Otis asked for the older man to pray for him then and there. They did and the older man got in his car and left with a friendly goodbye and a prayer of thanks. Who knows what he may ask next!

Who is your Otis? 

PAIN!!!

The Lord in his infinite wisdom allows us to be lowered in to the pit. As Psalm 88 says, even the lowest part of the pit. We are counted as dead, cask out, despised by many. Allowed to be made detestable in the eyes of men. For what? Why is it my pain that God uses? Why is it my loneliness that will allow me to see him? Why do I feel like I've been let down? I lay alone with nothing around me. Even the walls in this room seem miles away. The bed on which I lay is cold and hard, without compassion and not giving rest. My heart aches, my mind plans for the day's, weeks and years to come, but not even the next minute seems to arrive. The world around me is moving at a thousand miles per hour in a million different direction with no end in sight. Why will no one bring me with them? Why will God not allow me to go with them. I've yearned for you will my flesh and my soul. My body aches from loneliness. How dare I go through pain when I've praised your name, how dare I be put at the lowest place in the pit when I have famed your name? How dare you give me this burden? How DARE YOU!!!! 

My temptation is to end there, But GOD be glorified!!! HOW DARE GOD?!?!?! How dare GOd indeed!!! How dare him give to us what he promised? Life more abundant!!! How dare him use us? How dare him allow his praise to raise even from the depths of the pit!!! PRAISE BE TO GOD ALMIGHTY. GREAT THINGS YOU ARE DOING, GREAT THINGS YOU HAVE DONE, AND GREAT THINGS YOU WILL DO!!! MY "PROBLEMS" ARE OPPORTUNITY TO GIVE YOU GLORY!!! BE HERE AND USE ME NOW!!! WHETHER THROUGH PAIN, GLADNESS OR DEATH!!! 

How dare I expect from you anything shorter than yourself for me?

7th Grade Quote

A "wise" teacher of mine once told my seventh grade class, "There are only two things that you have to do in life, be born, and die. Everything else you do in life is up to you." Those words didn't mean much to me for a long time. All I cared about at that time in my life was if I had air in the tires of my BMX bike and if my crush looked at me during class. Now that I have lived some life I have discovered some things about these words of wisdom. They are totally and completely... Wrong!!!

I've been reading God Built by Steve Farrar. It's a look at Joseph, his life and the path God allowed him to travel in order to be where God wanted him, with the character God needed from him, and the tools Joseph needed to have in order to accomplish what God wanted. So I start to think about some things. Is birth and death the only absolutes in life? Is that the only sure thing prescribed for us to do.

I believe that God has some things that he would like us to do. I know that he has some specific plans that he would like us to follow through with, using some specific skill sets that he has developed in us, through some specific events that he's ordained. Birth... yes, very necessary. Death... also a condition that runs in all our families. What else? Is all of the above necessary? I don't feel that God will force us to do anything, but we must choose obedience or diobedience.

So to go along with the idea of editing from my last post I've made a correction.

"There are three things that we have to do in life, be born, die, and choose whether or not to obey Gods leading in our lives, everything else we do in life will be the flowing result of what we choose to do."
The best part of this ablosute, is that we serve a God of grace and mercy that gives us opportunity after opportunity to choose him.

From the Editor

It has been on my mind, to change some things about this blog... even though I only have a couple posts so far, I've considered going back and editing parts of these posts. How often we want to go back and change some things in life? I've resolved to change nothing... Sure I may change the profile picture and the amount of times that I post. But I cannot change, and really don't want to change or edit, the things that God has brought me through. I'm sure that I'm not as artistic has Him. He'll work things out a bit better. He promised that to us.

Kelli and I are not dating. My life feels like it has come to a halt, with the combination of coming home from school and the space that has been created between Kelli and I. Not rushing into the next five years tends to slow things down. Though my instinct is to begin to run again, and forget the chance that I may fall on my face, I'm going to stop, rest a while and seek out what God has to show me about himself.

A year and a half of planning and dreaming as been changed, and mixed up. It's hard to understand, but I'm beginning to realize that this is right where God wants me.

I hope that this blog can be an encouragement to all who come with me.

Spoken

A NEW MONTH, A NEW DAY, A NEW POST. 

Have you ever been speechless? Why? What was it that made you sit or stand there and wonder what, if anything, is supposed to come out of your mouth next? It's hard to know what to say sometimes, if not all the time. Do you take a risk and speak up, or play it safe and not say anything at all? Then there is always speechlessness from not being able to explain something. Do you just start talking and try to force your way through and hope that something, somewhat coherent, comes out? What if you are the type of person who shuts down waiting for everyone else to catch up to your level of understanding, which if you have forgotten is so great that you can't explain it. 

These past few weeks I have been speechless. Yes, I have talked outside of this blog, but not much. I tend to be the type of person who needs to talk my way through something. However "something" implies, one thing, which in my case is not the case. In fact, the facts that I've been finding have left me dumbfounded. Thats very plural, if you will. I've been hit with so many truths in the past few weeks. Truths that have challenged my character, some I've passed, some I've failed, and some are still to be determined. One liners from God that have turned "my" world upside down. (Have you ever considered that, turned my world.... IT'S NOT MY WORLD!!! and if anything was upside down it was by my doing, THINGS ARE BEING CORRECTED, NOT DESTROYED.) 

Here are those one liners... from Jesus! 

- Pick up your cross and follow me. 

- Whoever tries to find his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life will find it. 

- I love you.

-  I'll always come through for you. 

These things have been spinning through my mind at warp speed. I'm on emotional overload. Some of the things that I've been struggling with should , in a normal situation, leave me in tears. Nothing so bad that I need to pull out the sack cloth and ashes. No need to tear my cloak. I've just been dealing with some good old fashion, hard stuff. 

Just to let you guys in on a secret. I had no idea where I was going with this while I was writing it. Thank you though, for reading, I hope this is a blessing for you, as it has been to me. In saying that, I will tell you that as I began writing "leave me in tears" in the paragraph above, I had an epiphany. Maybe, just maybe, I'm winning out on these things. All these one liners that have left be blown away, what if they are words from GOD meant to give me peace. In typing those lines all I was thinking was what has GOD been letting me know lately. Going back and reading that it is very clear to me. 

Clayton, 

       Pick up your cross, follow me. Come and do what I've called you to do. Let go of what you think your life should be. I know what's best for you. I'm what's best for you. Keep holding on and things will begin to crumble. My plans are solid. In doing all of  this know that I love you. I'll never let you go. I'll never fail in my character, justice, grace, mercy, kindness, love, patience, all these things are always yours. Know that I will always come through for you. I've fought for you on the cross, I'm not going to give up on you now. I've given you so many things to do for my Kingdom. Lets go and get them done, you and I.

-God. 

Speechless? 

To go, or not to go?

In the big scheme of things, I have not been alive very long. My life has only been a blip on the radar. Though it's only been almost 21 years, I have begun to realize that I have made some pretty big decisions. 

Living with Mom / Living with Dad

High School Arts / High School Sports

Following Christ / Living in Darkness

Going to College / Not Going to College

  Going to SCC / Going to DBCC

- Relationships, Car Purchases, Associations, Ministry, Picking a University.

All of the above were/are things that I'm having to decide on. Go or don't go, which way do I go, buy or don't buy? Everyday I'm having to decide and live with the effects of whatever I may choose. 

I'm extremely happy where I'm at in my life. I have had so many blessing along the way. God has definitely anointed my path and is holding me through everything. There are things in which I could have made better decisions. I am where I am and I'm glad that I have become the person I am in Christ. 

These last few weeks I have been in the middle of the introduction to my new world called USF. I love it by the way. In the mist of my new room, new city, classes, workplace, church, and lifestyle, I have been mulling over a new decision that I suppose wasn't even on the back burner. I've had so much going on that this deal was in a glad ware container in the fridge. 

Do I apply to work for Student Life (SL) this year, or go home and work, try out for football, take summer classes, or a number of other things? Through much prayer, discussion with Kelli, a few church services and reading the word I came to the conclusion that I should go. This isn't easy for me. I'm leaving a lot of things to go do this. I'm sure that I will be ready for a slice of home after being here for 4 months. I would be able to have a restful summer with Kelli, see my family and my friends. But something deep inside of me can't pull from the fire that I have to be a part of the work SL does. 

(for all those who don't know Student Life is a Christian organization that is based out of Alabama. They go around all summer long putting on week long camps for youth groups. Their camps are phenomenal and travel all across the country. Their prices are the lowest around and they are still growing. I worked with them last winter in a Ski camp setting and I had an amazing experience. But it was hard. Hard to be away from home. Hard to load and unload in 6 degree weather. All the same I will never be the same having had that time in my life to serve. ) 

I was praying, I felt God leading me to go, (or at least to pursue and he will take care of the rest) and immediately the devil was after me. Now that I have thought about my attacks, I have realized it's a confirmation. You can always tell how much good is going to get done by the amount of spiritual warfare that goes on before hand. 

What makes me share this is the things that I was being hit with. Now people say that I never audibly hear god speak, or the devil for that matter. I have heard both but it's not such an audible thing, as it is a process in which my thoughts have been very specifically turned to what I feel either God or the devil is wanting me to do or think. This time it has been the devil telling me that I'm not good enough to serve on the student life team. These thoughts wold come out of nowhere. (other than the pit of hell) I found myself thinking this during a worship service which was not usual for me at all. It was terrible to keep returning to this lie. while praying, while talking about God, while putting on Christian shirts, while typing my last post. 

So I thought that I my hunt for some scripture and hear a better word from the God of the Universe. 

-2 Cor 12: 9-10 "My Grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness." Therefore, I will most gladly boast all the more about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may reside in me. So because of Christ, I am pleased in weaknesses, in insults, in catastrophes, in persecutions, and in pressures. For when I am weak, then I am strong. 

-Col 1: 19-22 "For God was pleased to have all His fullness dwell in Him, and through Him to reconcile everything to Himself by making peace through the blood of His cross- whether things on earth or in heaven." And you were once alienated and hostile in mind because of your evil actions. But how He has reconciled you by His physical body through His death, to present you holy, faultless, and blameless before Him

Rom - 8:37- 39 "For I'm convinced that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing will have the power to separate is from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord!"

 "The beauty of grace is that it makes life not fair." - Reliant K 

 God loves us without end and we desires us to serve him in his love. I am holy in Christ and wholly worthy to serve as a part of the Student life team. Th God be all Glory and Honor!

 

He is ALIVE!!!! 

So I go and I proclaim his name and I never allow the devil to get at me with his lies again.